How to Provide Psychological Help to Your Second Half if She Has Diabetes



There is a vast array of scientific researches on how mental state affects physical state. This article is devoted to the reverse side of this issue – the impact of the disease – diabetes – on the human psyche, as well as what to do with this influence. Diabetes mellitus is a disease that if it occurs, then accompanies a person during a lifetime. A person who has diabetes mellitus is forced to constantly monitor his state of health, display exceptional psychological restraint and self-discipline, which often leads to various psychological difficulties.

As practice shows, the hardest thing is to put up and live with this diagnosis to adolescents and women. In this article, we’ll talk about how to help your second half (your wife or a girlfriend) to go through all the difficulties and start a new life.

Understanding Diabetes

Drug therapy, of course, is necessary for diabetics and significantly improves the quality of life of people who have experienced this issue, but therapy is not that helpful in solving the psychological problems that people with diabetes may face.

The slogan “Diabetes is a way of life!”, widely known in diabetic circles, has a hidden deep meaning reflecting the social, medical and psychological aspects of the problem of life and health of people with diabetes. The formation and observance of the most necessary lifestyle in diabetes is impossible, both without the knowledge and skills of diabetes mellitus, the causes of its occurrence, the course, treatment, and without understanding that diabetes mellitus, as a chronic disease, requires that a person treat it with respect, realized his /her limitations, accepted and fell in love with his/her new personality, with these limitations.

The initial diagnosis is a shock for the diabetics themselves, especially for children, adolescents, women and for their families. “Thanks to” the disease, the need for frequent visits to procedures, to comply with doctor’s instructions, taking medications, communicating with a doctor, etc. a person suddenly finds himself in difficult psychological conditions. These circumstances, of course, entail the need to rebuild relations in the family, in the school, in the work collective, and the like.

Women are much more difficult to rebuild and accept themselves as a “sick person.” They think that this puts them in the position of people with a “flaw.” Your task, as a loving husband or boyfriend, is to create such living conditions for your beloved, that the process of making a new self has gone as smoothly and painlessly as possible. This can be achieved by having a desire and a certain knowledge.

Providing Psychological Help

People with such a diagnosis often have feelings of inferiority, depression, anxiety, resentment, guilt, fear, shame, anger, envy and the like can arise, need for caring from others may increase, or hostility may increase or appear; people feel desperate, can react to the loss of autonomy with desperation and indifference.

Relatives of a person with diabetes can do the following: do not treat your second half as a weak person, encourage her independence and responsible attitude to her, do not impose your help, but simply tell that, if necessary, she can always speak with you. Valuable for a diabetic will be your balanced interest (but a not painful concern) with her illness, patience, understanding of her difficulties and your honesty with her.

It is very important to a woman to feel that her beloved man does not perceive her as “maimed.” You should show the most delicately that now you will often show interest in her health, but otherwise, nothing will change. You are still a loving husband and wife.

If it is hard for your wife to switch to a new diet (this problem is most often encountered), show her by your example that there is nothing difficult in this. Change your diet with her. Your first task is to show and prove that she will not be alone and all the changes in life connected with the disease have absolutely no effect on your romantic connection.

The same is also true for new relationships. If you don’t know what to text a girl you just met (and found out that she has diabetes) – just do not focus on this and talk as if this information does not matter, except that you will not invite her to a date in the confectionery cafe.